Loneliness. Oh, you horrible black steel. Descend upon my shoulders, upon the roof of my skull, into my brain. Freezing my being to ice-cold desolation. To abysmal sadness and blackest emptiness….
Loneliness. When was the last time I felt you? How many decades ago was it?
Yesterday Tim was with me. An old – my last – school friend. He knows many people, but something is missing in his life. Something I am not able to give him permanently. No one is in this world. We had a good day. Like always. Just like old times. But he was irritable. Very slightly hidden, it was flickering inside him. Instinctively in opposition. Without trust. Abandoned by the world. Sometimes, more often, he did. – A lot of people have that these days, if you think about it….
Then last night Tim drove again. And today I feel it. All day long. His loneliness. And I become very quiet. And completely affected. Because I had forgotten what it felt like. Forgotten how deep the ice-cold steel shoves into the heart and brain. And I think that no one must endure this horror. We must not live like this. We must not let them live like this!
And I reach for the phone. I call him. Reach out my warm hand to him. To him, trapped in deepest darkness….